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The Senior General’s Wife who Married Actor “Loo Min”

In Burma, it is a popular trend among the generals and their wives to consult astrologers to safeguard their power over the people.  These generals vie amongst each other to see who can outperform whatever orders their astrologers give them.  Among these crazy people, the way the Senior General Than Shwe has conducted his yadaya voodoo is especially bizarre.  

According to the astrologer whom he worships, Than Shwe has been predicted to fall from power and so to maintain his authority, he made a selection from  the King of Celestial Spirits (Nat Min), the King of the Byamah Gods (Byahma Min), and the King of Humans (Loo Min).   Of these three, to ensure that he (the General) himself would still be King of Humans, he had his wife, Daw Kyaing Kyaing, married off to a movie actor called Loo Min  to conform to  yaddayar voodoo calculations, and arranged for a honeymoon trip to the Arakan coast.   

On that trip, the General and his family also went along, and it was confirmed by secure news sources from Rangoon that the General's wife went along as the wife of Loo Min.  Ohhh, how crazy you are, you crazy General. 

(end of translation)

Addendum Notes by Baydin Sayar

Yaddaya is a form of sacrificial voodoo.  If a person has an astrological prediction that he will be shot dead, he could have someone shoot at his reflection in the mirror while standing from a safe distance.  E.g., this was the yaddaya done by the original Generalissimo Ne Win during his era.   

Than Shwe's astrologer had predicted his downfall.  To avert this disaster, he must have recommended Than Shwe to make an alliance with the King of Humans.  But how can one find such a king?  Fortunately, there is a movie actor who is called Loo Min, literally meaning Human King, i.e., the King of all Humans.  Thus, by marrying off a member of his family to this King of Humans, Than Shwe could prevent his own downfall. He could have ordered his daughter to marry this film actor, and thus become the father-in-law of the King of Humans.   

Many kings of old used this technique to cement alliances with neighboring kings by giving away their daughters in marriage.  But apparently Than Shwe did not have any marriageable daughters to give away.  Or perhaps the daughter flat-out refused to go along (oh, these modern women are so independent and defiant of their fathers).  Or perhaps the daughter was married to someone else already.   

Be that as it may, instead of the daughter option,   Than Shwe arranged for his seventy-year old wife, Daw Kyaing Kyaing (Ms. Fragrant Fragrant) to marry this actor who was young enough to be her son. There are no reports as to what kind of coercion was forced upon the film actor, nor any news about his feelings on this matter.   There was no mention of any divorce, so now the General's wife has two husbands.  From a distorted sense of yaddaya "logic" this makes sense.  Had there been any divorce, the connection between the General and his wife would have been lost and so any protection from the Human King would not be carried over.  Thus, it had to be a polygamous marriage.  

 It is legal for a man to have more than one wife in Burma, and there have been such instances; however, for a man to willingly make his wife marry a second husband is unheard of, and is absolutely ridiculous, all the more so when taking into account that the General and his spouse are in their seventies!  

For a Burmese father to force his daughter to marry a man against her wishes is a bad thing, but such practices have been known to  take place.  But for an old man and his old woman  to willingly  take on a young man   --  just because he has a name of good omen  --  is totally bizzarre, even by the most outlandish yaddayars in Burma.

This should qualify as an entry to the Guinesss Book of World Records and to the News of the Weird columns in papers around the world.

Epilogue

This bizzarre Honeymoon to Arakan State was reported on 28 April and whether this yaddayar voodoo was effective for Than Shwe or not, can be gauged by the readers when they consider that on 29 April, Cyclone Mala hit the Arakan Coast in addition to parts of Irrawaddy and Rangoon Divisions further south, resulting in significant damage and loss.  Could it be that the two other Kings of the Celestial Gods, the Nat Min and Byamar Min, were jealous of Loo Min, the King of the Humans?

Baydin Sayar

(Original This News was originally reported by Maung Kyaw, and now translated by Baydin Sayar of Burma Digest) 

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